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Wednesday, August 05, 2009

1990 Was A Crazy Year

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You all know my friend Beth, right?  Singingirl?  The cooking queen contributor here on Raisin Toast?  Well, yesterday she sent me some of the craziest pictures of both of us from 1990, and we both had a good laugh.  This one is of Beth standing behind my Harley Sportster.  "You really wanted to ride it didn't you Beth?"



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When I look back on these pictures, I remember some things that I'd rather forget - like how insecure I was, despite what you see here of this motorcycle mama, I was terribly insecure.  I wasn't comfortable living alone or being alone.  As a matter of fact, I was miserable.  I was confused.  I was running scared on a Harley Davidson.  



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I did, however, decide to go back to school and get my degree, and that is exactly what I did.  In 1990 I went back to college at the age of 31 to Nova Southeastern University.  I traveled over 50 miles up and down Interstate 95 5 days a week on my Harley to classes (talk about a death wish)!



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I would stop by and visit Beth every chance I got as she was right in between my home in Boynton Beach and hers in North Lauderdale.  It was always great seeing Beth.

I met a motorcycle deputy from the Sheriff's office and would ride around town with him.  We dated for a while but then I started listening to my red flags and dumped him.  He wasn't good for me - at all.  Good looking - yes, Good for me - never.  Chalk that one up to stupidity.



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I did take a course on motorcycle riding with the deputies at the Sheriff department.  They let me test out the course right along with them.  Most of them were a good bunch of guys.  Told you I was crazy back then.

Now though, when I look back on these pictures, as fun as it all was, I remember how wound up around the axle I was all the time.  I remember how scared I was about life.  I remember the confusion and the racing heart in my chest.  It is amazing how life does finally come together for all of us eventually. Sometimes it takes a little longer than most (as in my case).  However, I wouldn't trade a day of those crazy days for calmer ones because all in all they taught me a lot about life and love.  I am who I am today because of those crazy days and I believe I am a better person for it.  



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I'm not scared anymore, although I still harbor fears that I think are deep set in my psyche.  But, that is just the way it is going to have to be.  I look over at the love of my life, my Big Bear, and thank the Lord everyday for this man who loves and adores me and our children.  I look at this man who takes care of us all and never complains.  I thank God for blessing me with a wonderful family, a beautiful home, and dear, dear, dear lifelong friends like Beth.

How lucky can one girl be anyway?



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